out of the tree of life I just picked me a plum.

South Africa '08

2008-04-12T10:03:00.000-07:00

South africa 2008.

It's one am in the morning, it's been more than a month since i got off the plane at changi airport, and i still feel the need to blog about one of the most amazing experiences i've ever had in my entire life. and it probably will stay this way for as long as i live!

the trip to south africa was unbelievable. the people are amazing. i honestly cannot begin properly so i'll just start from the place that changed me most: entabeni.

the game reserve. honestly the only other time i've felt so moved was when i went to see the grand canyon when i was fourteen. But still i now truly believe that beauty and nature cannot be appreciated by those below 15. When i went to visit the grand canyon, i definitely remember my heart skipping a beat as i approached the gigantic canvas. I definitely remember wanting to stand there for ever just looking on even though my legs were buckling and my fear of heights was starting to get to me. but i never remember feeling awful when i left. because i never made an effort to recognise that i was looking at true beauty, something created by what was once a stream. i just looked and oohed and ahhed, but i never took it in- i never uderstood. and i know i sounded like an idiot when i said that, butit really is true. you need to visit these places only when you have the capacity to realise that what you're looking at was a gift, to show you what God was all about,and to understand that when you see these things you honestly feel truly happy.

if i hadnt gone to entabeni i would have never realised this. because i went, i saw, and i cried, and i couldn't stop smiling when we went on the game drives. I swear sitting in that jeep and riding across the grounds of entabeni made me the happiest person i the world and i dont doubt that for a minute. I started panicking after our last game drive, though, because i was afriad that i wouldnt be able to remember what i saw during te game drive- and there was a particular feeling to it- the crisp wind and the comfortably cold air- and the plainess of the view- that we were expierencing a postcard. i hate my pictures, because they're 2 dimensional and they capture NOTHING of the magic of entabeni. I cried and i cried and i cried on the bus when we left entabeni and kept looking back because i was afraid that if i forgot everything i saw at entabeni, i would never be happy again. and i would thus grow bitter and cold because i forgot the magic. haha i know i may sound naive, but i KNOW that if yo went to south af you know what i mean because it's so difficult to understand the state of mind that place puts you in.

now can you understand?

i will post about aesthetics in south africa on a later date. haha i decided today was to be about all things beauutiful

much love

2007-09-03T08:08:00.000-07:00

forever God is with us,
Forever.

i've probably grown more in the past 2 weeks than i have my whole life- not so much in the sense that i've been getting epiphanies and stuff, but i've learnt so much i feel i have to make record of it and share it before it loses its distinctive importance.

everybody has their own way of glorifying God, their own method of worship. Some glorify him by spreading the word, and by evangelisation. Some worship him in their own quiet way. Both extremes and everything in the middle are equally powerful, and equally spiritually fulfilling. every aspect of my relationship with God is pure worship. The doubt, the questions, and all other negative aspects of my faith are what makes me christian. I cannot doubt without believing in the first place. I cannot question without feeling a need to understand. I am a catholic, through and through, and just because the way i worship is in contrast with the way others do, does not make me a hypocrite, nor does it make me a bad person. I move along with my journey of faith a little wiser, a little stronger. If i feel uncomfortable with sharing about my faith, it isn't because my faith isn't rooted, it is because my worship and my relationship is private, between me and my God. It brings me happiness, yes, to worship collectively, and to feel the power of God working through so many people around me. I do believe that it is important to share about one's journey through faith, because it is what inspires others to join in, but there are some things that people need to learn for themselves. The power of God's love is felt through his people, but it is what one experiences with him personally that keeps him strong and rooted. many things have happened to me that have kept me strong in my faith. i may not lead a christ-centred life, but i do thank God at every opportunity for the good and the bad things that have happened, because i learn how to worship him better every step of the way.

bottom line: i love my Lord, and when i say that i shouldn't be judged on what i do wrong, but what i do to change it.

done. geeeeeeeez i hope i made sense.

2007-06-06T04:20:00.000-07:00

i miss the poetic inspiration and blindbliss i usedtohave when i was, well, smitten with someone. haha, are a few supeer stupid experiences goingto DOOM ME TO SPINSTERHOOD? no lah.
andi have a rather cool question!

do poets always laugh at their own poems when they read them after a long time??

i super hope so. otherwise it means i'm a SUPER TERRIBLE poet.

anyway, i am pledging myself to the statute of demurewomen.

ishallnot utter a SINGLE swearword until my 18th birthday,

the list consists of:

Fornication Under Consent ofthe King (hahah weifen taughtme that!)
Vagina inallother languages and dialects (except pundei, because it's become too natural)
Shit (i shall replace with snap)
OH MYGOD (which has been effectively replaced with ZOHMYGAD

wellit'smostly the first one, because i say thatlike it'sa sentenceinterjection, and it's SUPER UNATTRACTIVE! so i shall become demure and positively alluring by clippingmy vulgar tongue.

that said, i should really start studying for terms.

icannotfailicannotfailicannotfailicannotfail

new year, new post

2007-02-25T06:58:00.000-08:00

haha well hey everyone. about 2 months have passed since new year, but whichever. this will be my much anticipated (heh) new year's post, officially ushering the new year in.

sigh i wish i could've done this in a better mood, but stuff's been tough, but when stuff gets tough you become tough stuff eh? EH? HAHA I JUST COINED A COOL QUOTE, woooo ya'll going to bannerise it and stick it on your walls i can just see it.

when STUFF gets TOUGH, you become TOUGH STUFF
-frances maria, PhD. Mathematics & Science, Hons. Lit, Nobel Prize Laureate.

church bbq partay.

2006-11-27T07:39:00.000-08:00

well, we pulled off the church bbq (cum steamboat) party eh!

not to say it was a roaring success, but enough people came (20 odd?) haha so that was aight.

let me first point out that i have NEVER, EVER NEVER steamboated before. and denis with her goshdarned mussells, kept spraying me with scalding hot larva oil every 5 seconds. i boiled a crab claw, but some asshole stole it. (darnyou!)

the party was fun after awhile, when denis' homemade chocolate cake (which was AWESOME) was served, and i started cutting slices and serving everyone. threatened to stab edmund but he instead got away with having bits of cake flung on his face.

I DIDN'T GET DRUNK OKAY. i was only HIGH, because A- i remember what happened last night (EVERYTHING) and B- i didn't have a hangover this morning, SO THERE, i still stand by the fact that i can hold my liquor. the guys were shagged, though. HAHA HA.

the SSS party was fun HAHA, me and teresa were stalking this boy sitting at the pool, we were shouting from the balcony (ROMEO, OH ROMEO!) between fits of giggles, and after a while he got so scared he called for BACKUP, AAAAAAAAAAHAHA. we were THAT bad?!

happy birthday sonia, sophie and sherry! hope you liked the toffee :P

my mom's been gone for 3 days- i really really should not be getting used to this.

oh, and i LOVED PROM! send me pictures, everyone! my camera went dead :(

o devils are over

2006-11-17T06:54:00.000-08:00

O DEVILS ARE OVER!

AND FOR ONCE, IM BLOGGING WITHOUT GUILT!

IM GUILT-FREE!

AND COMMENT-FREE!

BUT AHMAHGAWD, okay i have a paper on monday, BUT I HAVE SATURDAY AND SUNDAY TO WORRY ABOUT THAT, FRIDAY'S PARTAY DAY!

okayokay, so for the first time in twentymillionyears, i went for youth night in church w denis. and the topic of discussion for the night was-

death.

how morbid! we were supposed to talk about like how we saw death and stuff? and how most people were afraid, some embraced, some were indifferent.

me? shant say. i mean, alright, if i die tomorrow, i'll be safe and say I LOVE YOU ALL, but honestly- it's not something im prepared for? and i dont want to spoil a perfectly good blog entry with morbid thoughts, so it's okay! i'll take a raincheck on the deathpost.

now i get to play my guitar without guilt, do SO MANY THINS WITHOUT GUILT, im almost CRYING because it's so overwhelming- i am FREE. FREE FREE FREE FREE FER-REEEE!

just to epitomize all the feelings of elation and relief and almost MANIC excitment, im going to go blonde!

LEGALLY, of course.

my heart is singing- i havent got much left to say, but i feel like i could go on for ages! my plans, everything. but i'll stop here, and go listen to ella fitzgerald, and for the first time in months, i will RELAX!

thankyou, thanyouthankyouTHANKYOU!

HAHAHA

2006-11-07T06:42:00.000-08:00

2006-11-01T03:33:00.000-08:00

screw R K narayan.

oooooooooooooooooo no!

2006-10-20T22:40:00.000-07:00

o levels.

hahahahaha! i foolishly remember commenting at the end of last year -"i think next year's going to go by very slowly"
and today i find myself racing against the clock to study study cram cram!

where's a self-fulfilling prochecy when you need one.

this will be my last blogentry until after os.

a very disturbing feeling that's been foreign to me for 4 years is starting to introduce itself again. a mixture of anxiety, hope, nausea, anxiety, and anticipation. anxiety that i have 'unfinished business that i wont be able to fulfill after i leave, eg. ill-spent april fool's days. and of course do i have enough time do i have enough effing timmme?

and the nausea at the prospect that however much i've liked the time i spent at st margs, i may see it again for a whole nother year,

anticipation, GREAT anticipation of things to come. the fun, the drama, the lights, the music! the hope of finding a new lease of life i have for so long left aside in hope of studting but resulting in inevitable procrastination. my last chance, with no time to waste on shoulda coulda wouldas, but focusing instead on must carry on. what will i be doing this time next month? year? decade? i hate being so pensieve, but at the eve of a life changing exam it's hard not to consider all possible prospects. what if what if what if.

will i see anyone again, will i be happy next year? i know i will most definetaly cry at the end of feb 2007, just the knowledge of whether the tears will be joyous or angsty i have yet to possess.

a song i may suggest, for relieving stress, would be crying BY AEROSMITH. it's sufficiently angry and strangely uplifting.

to everyone i know taking to o levels- whatever the outcome, i hope you'll still be able to do what you've always dreamed of doing. i hope you go far, and i hope you do everything in your power to make sure that on the last day you walk out of the exam hall, you are content, and without regret. i hope to share in your tears of joy :)

love you ALL, and thank you for your unconditional tolerance!

post-lims

2006-10-02T02:25:00.000-07:00

heres a blog-old question:

what do we blog FOR?

self-entertainment? entertainment, period? self-therapy?

well, any of the above you may pick, but i honestly blog because there simply isnt anything else to do.

i mean, it's not a LAST RESORT, like homework. it's more of, "hmm, what to do? blog lah!' and i truly truly HATE blogging about nothing in particular. isnt that selfish? lie other people want to know every single mundane detail about your life.

unless of course, someone out there has a MAD CRUSH on me, and desperately wants to know that my favourite colours range from red to pink, and that next valentine's i'd expect a box of cadbury froggies and pink carnations.

well, on to more important things, i have decided, to come out of the closet.

NONO, not the closets where secret lesbians hide, but the one where passionate lovers of this movie are forced to dwell, shunned by society, ridiculed and laughed at.
here goes.

i think titanic is the most BRILLIANT movie ever EVER made.

i can't say anymore, because i may burst into passionate tears (haha) but honestly, it is THE BEST love story ever written, the most perfect kind of love, with the most BRILLIANT music score, and leo de caprio, of course.

and this is a big SHUT UP YOU STUPID PRATT to all those who don't like kate winslet cos she's FAT.

alright, im done, and I CANT WAIT FOR DEPAVALI!

Steve Irwin

2006-09-07T07:11:00.000-07:00

Crikey.

The Croc Hunter's Croaked!

It's amazing really, and so sad, because it's something you never expect to happen so soon. Steve Irwin the great, who cuddles with crocodiles and sings monotonous lullabys to the most venomous of snakes, dying instantly from a pierced heart, by an ignorant stingray.

Put bluntly, he died of a broken heart.

I wonder what's happened to that stingray. It's quite funny in a sadistic way, really. It attacked the person LEAST LIKELY to cause it any harm whatsoever. But I'm glad he died that way. i think it was the best way for him to go: quick and painless, doing something he loved.

So this is for the Immortal, fearless, quirky crocodile hunter, who died the best way possible.

"Crikey, 'at's a beeutey."

8 Mile

2006-09-01T06:17:00.000-07:00

Has ANYONE watched 8 mile?

if no, it is a BRILLIANTLY SEXY MOVIE, my goodness. it honestly NEVER crossed my mind that eminem was actually PRETTY DARN GOOD-LOOKING.

alright, MAYBE NOT, but definitely SEXY. AND IN THE MOVIE, OMG, YOU UST HAVE TO WATCH THE SEX SCENE with brit murphy at the chemical plant. whoa. although there's a part where brittany starts licking he hands that i totally don't dig, but otherwise, mamapearl, it's gorgeous.

WATCH IT, YO! *punks out*

Nostalgia

2006-08-26T04:42:00.000-07:00

haha, i was just thinking aobut my church choir retreat to malacca, and one of the funniest things had happened. we were having dinner in an open-air restaurant famous for it's signature chilli crab (and I, crab connoisseur extrodinaire, was not disappointed) and we were talking and laughing when this stray dog ventured near our table, and afew of us squealed in alarm, and afew of the boys tensed up, and nicholas, this brave, brave boy of 14, said-

"wah lao, you all so scared for what? it's just a dog what!"

he gets up, follows the dog, tries to pet it and sings "hello, doggie!"

BOWWOWOWOWOW RAAAAWRGH

nicholas pauses for a split second, jumps about a foot in the air, screams until the malaccan straits start to vibrate in response (imagine the response of you droping a cockroach on your little sister's lap. yes, that's it) and sprints towards the table we were sitting at. a half hour later our chilli crab had come and i was still in tears. and i STILL giggle at the memoory.

have i blogged about this before?

haha, if i have, sorry, dilligent readers. it was just a happy memory.

alright, here's something i want EVERYBODY who read this to do (and BE HONEST)-

5 simple things that make me happy:
- funny memories that make me smile to myself and look like a right idiot on the bus
- good friends :)
- naughty toddlers
- dinner with relatives
- plucking out my leg hair.

prelims and O levels are coming, and although this is abit old-songish, i think remembering simple things that make us happy in life mkaes things a teenzy bit easier.

agreed?

adios, muchachos. my next blog entry will come wednesday night, after social studies.

DUM DUM DUM....

M.I.A

2006-08-23T05:07:00.000-07:00

hello once again, adoring public!

i haven't been blogging for a while, but i probably would'nt have started this soon if not for the DEVASTATION that NOBODY HAS BEEN TAGGING MY BOARD! such heartache.

oh yes, ANYWAY, a bit of EXCITING news, I GOT AN AUDITION FOR THE DRAMA ELECTIVE PROGRAMME IN ACJC AHHHH, HOW DELIGHTFUL! the two audition pieces are pretty intriguing- one's from anne frank (i find it highly amusing that i am about to play the part of a starving jewish girl, whilst in real life i am an over-fed gentile.) and the other's from a very complicated french soap "Cyrano de Bergerac" where i am a stunningly attractive girl (snort) who has fallen for AND won-over a stunningly handsome man (snort snort) of whom i THINK writes brilliant poetry, but it is actually from a man with a big nose who loves me madly, but pretends to be big handsome man so he can openly express his love through him. see? told you it was complicated.

i wonder what i'll say if the ask for my dance background. "oh yes, i did ballet when i was young... although the evidence is lacking, i assure you it is true... i still have the stockings... that have since been eaten by moths... but i assure you, i have done ballet before. oh yes, and in primary 6 i did a bit of line dancing. does that help?"

goshdarnit. talk about a moment to throw away the pudding ang dig out the carrots.

anybody got the number of madonna's personal trainer?

Haven

2006-08-11T21:24:00.000-07:00

here you go, becca :D!

last saturday, i walked into ACS(i) with very low expectations of the school musical, caused by disappointments such as, ahem, Anne of Green Gables, the likes. The Musical in question was called 'Haven' and takes place in war-torn Singapore, in the early 1940s. The Japanese had just occupied Singapore, and the story revolves around a group of youths and their way of life in a school called 'Haven', how they learn to trust, depend and look out for one another. A heart-wrenching story, but balanced out with good-ol' Singaporean humour and girly crushes. Julian and Victor, the two (cough) 'heart-throbs' were very popular among the girls, and watching them deal with girls (Victor actually getting himself a real-life girlfriend) provided light humour, and was very well done.

The Choir, who kept appearing out of nowhere to provide back up to the songs, stole the show. I laughed until my sides SPLIT when there was this particularly tense scene between Victor and some other dude, and the background suddenly lit up, and there the choir stood. How exhillarating!

Rebecca was Aunty Lian, the chinese ah mah whose adopted son was Julian. i must say she spoke impeccable english for an ah-mah. But she was GREAT anyway! and becca, i had no idea you coud dance!

put simply, haven was SPECTACULAR! the songs were great, the acting was great, the sets were adequate, the singing was waaay above average, and it was such a good plot! Sorry to those who missed it.

Joseph Jeremiah

2006-08-09T00:15:00.000-07:00

in a rare flare of artistic inspiration, i wrote a song in the final minutes of the Chinese B exam, make of it what you will!

This, right here, is a simple tune
Composed while staring at the moon.
Well I must confess, that was not true,
I wrote it, thinking about you

A pathetic lie, I know I told.
But alas, my love, i'm growing old.
I need someone for me to hold
By the Fire when it gets to cold.

Dear Joseph Jeremiah,
You set my heart a fire,
The light of my desire,
Is you.

Dear Joseph Jeremy,
You're the knees of my bees,
You hold my hanky when I sneeze,
Love me, please.

arty farty

2006-07-27T05:52:00.000-07:00

ART'S OVER!

and for a whole nother week, i am FREE!

watching rockstar INXS, is seriously, SERIOUSLY, beyond sexy.
it's one of those shows where you watch throughout with your jaw dropped, but your lips curved, and when it's over and you turn off the TV, you're like

"I want to be a goddamned rockstar.

MAMAPEARL, cannot tahan. the girls even, they are FANTASTIC! my favourite is Storm, watch starworld at 8pm weds, and you'll understand.

singapore idol- singing the standards. i wanted to CRY, OMG.DID YOU HEAR EMILEE? SHE SANG 'MAKING WHOOPEE' my god when she sings it it sounds like a song about farting. it's one of my favourites, and she thrashed, banged, zanged and THRANGED it.

the standards in general was a terrible show. but mathilda and jonathan were GORGEOUS. and, i unfortunately think joakim is BEYOND good-looking, but enough about tv.

i'm going to go study what i can now, wish me luck

jack be nimble, jack be quick

2006-07-22T07:39:00.000-07:00

dancing is a sign of being in love.

or being infatuated.

i hate the word infatuation. sounds so childish and understated.

but saying "i'm in love" at the age of sixteen, would also cause you not to be taken seriously.

so what do we say?

i'm taken with someone. so dramatic.

im interested. so boring!

im crazy about someone. abit tootsie.

SO WHAT DO YOU SAY? is there a perfect way to say it? i think the closest way would be "I'm taken with someone." words are so restrictive! or you could say "i love you" in a different language. that would work.

Ti amo.

I think that's perfect.

juvenile asinine ubelievable ARH

2006-07-19T04:31:00.000-07:00

there are somethings i've said that i truly regret.

most of the things i've said don't exactly hurt people's feelings, they just embarrass the living bejesus out of me.

especially since i've said them on blogs.

that was one of the reasons why i hated having a blog, because i'd read previous posts and go" what the DEVIL was i thinking?!" but it's over. and i (hopefully) grow up all the time so rude reality spasms are pretty unavoidable.

another thing- i find it tremendously embarrassing that stmargaret's hails herself as an arts school with an 'arts niche' when we come up with musicals like anne of green gables and, brace yourself, clash of the elements. clash of the elements. omg. sounds like a kungfu story.

by the way, come to our school musical on aug 1st, Clash Of The Elements. it'll be an unforgettable night.

no disclaimer needed.

If You Were Gay

2006-07-16T18:38:00.000-07:00

triumph

2006-07-06T05:59:00.000-07:00

you know what i miss?

PSLE.

times when i could afford to pretend to study, to look as if im struggling with all strength and fervour on a math question, and once my mother leaves to jump in front of the tv and turn to spongebob squarepants, without a second thought.

those days are gone.

i really am truly sorry, i just realised i was probably depressing the hell out of a fair few with this unpleasant realization, people usually visit blogs for entertainment, eh? (response- hear, hear!

i really shouldn't be so down.

it cant JUST be the o levels that are making me so annoyingly low?

remedy 1- smile at everyone that passes by, even sarah francis.

lets see how that'll work, ONWARD!

The Green Mile.

2006-07-05T09:13:00.000-07:00

seeing as the response to my previous post was so overwhelming, and had such fiery enthusiasm in taking the quiz, i'll just douse the fervour for abit and report something COMPLETELY HORRID.

i am sitting naxt to kilarnjeet kor*.
best friend to kiki labelle.
nightmare to many.

*(names have been changed to protect their identities)

i am too depressed to say anything else.

im going to drown my sorrows with orange juice.

Quiz!

2006-07-04T06:41:00.000-07:00

haha, i created a quiz! TAKE IT IF YOU DARE.

http://www.quizyourfriends.com/quizpage.php?quizname=060704093529-633966&

enjoy.

spread this.

2006-07-01T21:42:00.000-07:00

THE EVENING'S OVER!

my goodness, i thought the guy was 60, turns out he was 70!!! name was paul drayson, and by the looks of the celebration he was extremely, extremely, beyond rich. picture this: a vast ballroom, clad with a devastatingly gorgeous chandelier, baloons yellow and whie strewn overhead and on the mavable parque dancefloor, thirty-odd tables seating 10, each person getting a personal bottle of wine, and a small box with finest godiva chocolate. a buffet to DIE for, LOVELY champagne and red wine that was rather tasty.

so you can imagine, it was rather intimidating. and it's been a while since i was last able to perform, so i was quite happy that friday night.

TOMORROW'S A HOLIDAY!

btw, if you have time on monday, make a point to go to the thai fair at the thai embassy (orchard, can't miss it unless youre blind and deaf) it is the epitome of shopping in thailand, bargaining, GORGEOUS chicken wings, clothes, accesories, coconuts, EVERYTHING! go if you have the time!

and please, for the love of god, COMMENT!

LE GRANDE HYATus

2006-06-29T07:34:00.000-07:00

im performing at the hyat tomoorow!

yay!

im not sure if it's a performance or a gig, but i guess both mean the same, just that one's more hip than the other (eugh, i sound like an old lady)

BUT ANYWAY- it's supposed to be a birthday party for some english journalist or something, turning 60. real aristocrats going. AND IM GOING TO BE SINGING! is this not HUGE?

this is one of the few times where i wish i weren't fat. im wearing a sequinned red dress with a black shawl and red pointy shoes. i was looking at myself in the mirror, and i hope beyond tangible hope that i don't look like a chubby prostitute. and that there won't be any chinese men over 65, i have cheekopehkaphobia.

and i hope i dont sound like a banshee at the high notes

and i hope i'll be tremendously pleased with myself this time tomorrow.

i hope i don't go to sleep never wanting to sing again.

fatal prediction

2006-06-28T08:32:00.000-07:00

tomorrows going to be LOUSY.

with art and history all in one day.

i think the worst subject in the world has got to be art history.

i've done SBQ, but im STUMPED by the SEQ questions! im just glad i've done something.

it seems now school's started there's nothing to blog about but school.

although there really isnt much interesting about it, but thats all there is.

school.

i lead such an intriguing life.

great expectations

2006-06-27T01:21:00.000-07:00

well, tuesday's come, but not exactly gone.

and i'm very relieved, but not very proud to announce that i've managed to get away with not bringing both SS and physics homework on duedate, escaping with no more than a slightly bruised ego.

im probably going to have to go on hiatus soon, which is very, very sad as that will be the time i need to blog the most. to do something ELSE besides study all day and sleep all night.

speaking of sleeping, how many of you actually dream regularly?

i don't, but i wish i did. sleeping would be so much more interesting then.
i remember i once had a dream about the power rangers turning into toothpaste, and there was one point where i was absolutely head over heels in love with the power rangers, especially white and pink ranger. imagine how devastated in was when i woke up. haha, i remember telling my mom and she was so concerned. i didnt think much of it then as i thought she ought to be (i mean, it was the POWER RANGERS, COME ON!) but now it's quite funny, and sweet eh?

ive had taunting dreams, on days where i couldnt find my phone and i went to sleep and found it in my dream, and woke up feeling SUCH ANGUISH. but aiyah.

i had a dream about aaron carter too, my first celebrity crush, haha. but i shant elaborate, its a teensy bit embarrassing.

i just reread harry potter 5 and 6, and am ITCHING for number 7 to come out. but at the same time i don't want it to come out, as im afraid once i finish reading it i'll have nothing more to look forward to in life, and end up slitting my throat.

just a gentle reminder, once the book comes out, kindly keep all information on the book to yourselves, as i am a slow reader and i probably wouldnt have finished the book yet. and if anybody tells me, i swear i have the potential to murder.

i should get off the computer. until next time, faithful friends!

say my name

2006-06-24T03:00:00.000-07:00

the 4 funniest names i've ever heard (TRUE actual examples)

Heidi Ho.

Philip Goodcock.

Lily Lee Li Li.

Englebert Humperdink.

the poor souls, high school must've been and will be terrible for them.

i actually like the name jessica a lot. it's very versatile, cuz you don't need to have a face that suits the name. like frances, all the franceses in the world have distinctive looks, that make them look like franceses. they all look remarkably intelligent, and unbelievably attractive.

i might name my children after french cities, like paris or avignon. because they both belong to france, (GET IT?) they are france's. ha ha ha.

i love the name ferris. and dylan. and LOUIS, ('s' unpronounced) for boys.

am i boring my public?

i wonder how parents decide on what to name their kids. my name was easy, san francisco was my mom's and dad's favourite city, apparently. so if i was a boy, i'd be francis anyway.

hahaha, i wonder if i'll ever meet someone named singapore. parents would either be dead boring or have a crude sense of humour.

i would crack up if i ever met a chinese girl named beyonce. HAHAH!

alright alright, i haven't got much else to talk about. but when you comment, leave your favourite names down!
(excluding your own, please)

i daresay i'll see you all on monday, but i promise you i won't be looking forward to it.

Bebob balula

2006-06-23T06:24:00.000-07:00

I am WIRED.

nono, i am BEYOND wired. i am INSPIRED.

i am DRIVEN!

by the way, a word of advice to all- if you currently are in my situation, that is, taking o levels or some other exam pragrammed to make you loose your marbles, and you're starting to see signs of premature aging, i would strongly, strongly STRONGLY suggest you take up yoga. ALL OF YOU, YES, EVEN BOYS. (NC-16, though) i bought a book "yoga and pilates" a couple of months ago, just dug it up, and did yoga for A WHOLE HOUR today. YES, I KID YOU NOT. i probably didn't do it properly, as im not yet aching all over, but i feel REVIVED! i feel totally BRING IT ONISH, like i could tackle a whole army of screaming mums and prinicples of accounts. i felt, like a youthful 16 year old, something which i feel many of us are forgetting we actually are. yes yes, major exam coming, no nonsense, but this ISN'T NONSENSE! it's like ACADEMIC VIAGRA!

i swear, all who need something that helps mental anxiety ( i dont like the word stress) TAKE UP YOGA!

alright, that aside, i saw something rather disturbing yesterday that i forgot to blog about, due to my sudden outburst, as seen below. but no matter, i shall tell of it now.

i was sitting with my mom at spinelli's while she was reading a magazine, scoffing and tuting every 3 seconds. now my mom's a good judge of writing, so i picked up an identical copy from the table (magazine provided by spinelli's) and flipped to a page that had an article that headed "the evils of breathing"

now, after seeing that, i imagined, noooo, it couldn't be. must be some sort of metaphor for life or something. who would be stupid enough to waste hundreds of trees printing an article about the detriments of breathing? ha ha, ha ha ha.

opening sentence- "respiration. why do we need it?" and then this imbecilic writer goes on and talks about how breathing causes most of our problems, from migranes to doing a poor job picking up a stranger at a bar. i got so disgusted after 2 paragraphs i shut the magazine and never touched it again. touched a nerve. so what if breathing was a problem? what did he want to do, stop? by all means, i would've loved to help him. his arrogance was APPALLING. what on earth was the point in telling people that breathing is bad?? it's like telling women "giving birth hurts" WHAT, SO ALL WOMEN IN THE WORLD UNITE AND STOP GIVING BIRTH? honestly. i dont know why it got to me so badly, but i HATED it that people were wasting their time writing and printing stupid articles, that made no impact in mine or anybody else's life im sure, but only served to aggravate it. why were people talking about problems that couldn't even be solved when so many, SO MANY other problems in the world were staring us in the face, and nothing was to being said or done about them? problems that were solvable?!?! that giant of a prat deserves to be deported to africa, without belongings, and live there for the rest of his life. i'd like to see him worry about picking up a girl at a bar because hi's BREATHING'S ALL WRONG, that disgusting pile of dog droppings.

i shall work off my bad mood by doing afew namastes, then it's off to chemistry for me!

ONWARD!

Reminiscing

2006-06-22T03:01:00.000-07:00

This is going to be a long entry. brace yourselves.

Do you believe in soulmates?
Do you believe, that the universe is positioned in such a way that everybody in this world is linked, one way or another, to each other, but theres one particular link between two people that can never, ever be broken?

Romantic, isn't it? I believed that for quite some time. and i'd like to think i still believe in that, not wanting to be too realistic as i personally and very strongly believe that cynicism causes people to be, although very mature, thoroughly miserable. I want to believe that there is such a thing as someone you were meant to be with, because that would undoubtedly mean that it isn't all in our hands, wouldn't it? somebody else would be planning all this for us. But isn't there one small but hugely significant flaw in this arrangement that causes this to be all immpossible? HUMAN ERROR?

WHAT IF, for example, you actually meet that special someone, but you're too busy to notice? like for example, it's during the year of a majorly MAJORLY important exam, and you can't have a relation ship just yet, and he's all broken hearted he moves to africa, and get stampeded by a herd of elephants, and you never ever see him again? does the link change? or do you die alone, or with Mr. Wrong?

What if you MEET HIM/HER, you're completely free, but they don't give a shit about you? but with all the feeling in your gut, no matter how much people dissuade you, you KNOW that there is some good in them, whatever flaw you see. you're not blind, but when the situation gets so hopeless that they start to fade from your thoughts, weird signs start appearing, like opening a page in the bible that says "have faith, and he will come" or your watching tv and this singer that has your first name, and his surname, pops up on the telly. this little boy you meet in church thats so fond of you and doesnt want to let gp of your hand has is name.

can you CHOOSE whether or not to take this seriously? or do you act like it a coincidence, risk yourself being miserable. what's all this rubbish with "if it's meant to be it's meant to be"? how can one spend life relying on divine intervention? is the sign the aforementioned, or the millions of people telling you you're a stupid git?

I don't know.

but i really, really want to. the naive prat i'm becoming.

Let it Be- Beatles

2006-06-16T02:33:00.000-07:00

When I find myself in times of trouble,
Mother Mary comes to me, speaking words of wisdom: Let it be.
And in my hour of darkness, she is standin here in front of me
Whispering words of wisdom, let it be.

Let it be, let it be, let it be, let it be.
Whisperin' words of wisdom, let it be.

You all really should download the song! (or buy the cd, rather. heheh.) it's a fantastic song, the kind of song you listen to when you're hopeless, or when something is really wrong and you can't do anything about it, and you hear it, and you feel an overwhelming sensation of deep acceptance. within yourself. I love it. love it love it love it!

two posts in a day, that must be a record! well there isn't really much else to do besides study, so this is a good distraction in the meantime. anyway, for sonia mao's tag thing, since i've been tagged i shall do the 8 things (cuz i think it's such fun) but i simply can't for the life of me think of 8 people that read this blog, so isn't much point in that, eh?

1. MUST be irish
2. can never, EVER wear bermudas
3. must be blind (snigger)
4. hairwise? as long as it's not in a ponytail, it's fine.
5. must make my insides go squishy when he smiles :) ( oh COME ON, YOU ALL WANT THAT TOO DON'T FIB!)
6. no nipple piercings, PLEASE.
7. must be able to make adequate conversation.
8. and must be nice to my mum.

THERE! 8 top qualities. i'll go shower now, have a fantastic weekend!

TRIVIA - did you know, the proper response to "top o' the mornin' to ya" is

"n' the rest o' the day to yourself?"

Backa from Malacca!

2006-06-15T12:45:00.000-07:00

I had a pretty awesome time in malacca, despite afew unavoidable mishaps. which probably happen all the time, anyway. I shan't give you a daybyday breakdown of what happened, but i'll just provide you with hilights-

Father JJ is a rotund (i'm not being rude) priest, indian with curly hair. (shut up, weifen) he plays the guitar like a DREAM, and is the most personable preist i've EVER met. sat next to him on the journey to and from, with him playing oldies on the guitar for a total of i think, 1 1/2 hours! as a spiritual director, he was great as well, explaining contradictions in the bible and making me much stronger in faith. His passion is very inspiring.

alright, on to hilights! i fell sick with the flu on the second day, it wasn't very serious, but i used it as and excuse to not attend practice. and BOY was i lucky, practice went on for 3 WHOLE HOURS with only TWO FIVE MINTUE TOILET BREAKS. urgh. when i came down from my room for mass, i was already perfectly fine, but had to sneak in afew hacking coughs and sneezes (which were very realistic, thank you). so i managed to avoid snide remarks. phew.

at night we played daidee and bluff, and there was this really amusing instance where we were playing bluff and I HAD WON and nicholas got rid of his pack second, so only nicole and lianna were left playing. but after about 10 minutes, we realised bluff coldn't be played by two people, HAHA, it was pretty stupid.

the next night we went to a seaside restaurant, right next to the straits of malacca. there are HUNDREDS of stray dogs in malacca, and there were so many at the restaurant (it was open aired). anyway, nicole had this HUGE paranoia with dogs and went rigid with fear everytime one got near, so nicholas was like- why you all so scaaared? you so much bigger than the dog what."

you know what happened right after that? he went up to a dog, and tried to pet it, said "hello doggie!"

ARF ARF ARF.

l swear, nicholas jumped about a foot in the air! screamed like a terrified little girl, and ran off faster than you cold say "scardy cat"

i hadn't laughed so hard since god knows when.

i hope you all didn't miss me too much, i'm going to have to get back to my study routine. i'm about to start now, wish me luck.

and sanity.

wish it were sunday.

2006-06-11T00:42:00.000-07:00

courtesy of sonia mao (bestof.provocateuse.com) I GIVE YOU-

DIEGO LUNA!

and my JUDE LAWS!

what a sexy, sexy name, eh? JUDE LAW. fits the face! (but there was one that showed him really, really hairy. it was quite disturbing)

im off to malacca tomorrow! to eat BUCKETS of ice kacang! fern- i heard they still have ice balls there!

goodbye everyone, till i return! don't miss me too much!

saturday. whataday.

2006-06-10T00:44:00.000-07:00

am about to study history, but i thought i'd provide a little trivia!

fran trivia!

RACE CAR, spelt backward, is RACE CAR

666 is the sum of the squares of the first 7 prime numbers.

that's all i've got, but i'll come up with more soon!

question- would you rather win $10 000 for yourself, or $1 000 000 for charity?

2006-06-10T00:40:00.000-07:00

Haloscan commenting and trackback have been added to this blog.

PROJECT J

2006-06-09T07:43:00.000-07:00

today, i must say, was one of my more fulfilling days.emotionally or spiritually, doesn't matter, but i feel extremely satisfied.

morning there was school, and laura called after that and we met for a rather late lunch. nice feeling, going for lunch with an old friend. or rather, a friend you haven't seen in a while.

and at NIGHT, i went for my first youth meeting in the newly reformed youth group- project J. previously known as- anawhim, a name which paticularly disturbed me ( probably because it sounds like -and a whim). the name stands for 'project jesus'. anyway we had praise and worship, where father JJ lead us in hymns such as 'in his time' and 'spirit song'. it was quite nice, getting together like that. comforting being the word most apt.

after that, got into groups of 7 to discuss 'a moment in our lives which we thought jesus was most present'. i panicked beyond BELIEF. honestly, i wish i could say otherwise, but i rather shamefully admit, besides the other 6 in my group, i had never had a hardcore Godly moment in my life. some talked about being slain and feeling the spirit move them, in fact most did. what did i talk about? a time when i didn't do a paticular assignment that was due on that day, but the teacher had to go home after a while cuz he was too sick to come to class. i know, nothing unusual, but i did actually pray and plead for him not to come. and look what happened!

so yes, it was very nice, sharing in that way. everyone was extremely encouraging and receptive. and most were open whilst a couple refused to share personal experiences, not to be blamed, im sure. but im looking forward to next friday!

monday im off to malacca!

i am well aware that in many aspects im horribly immature. i make decisions which are extremely irrational, i say things without thinking, and i rely rather heavily on my gut. which has proven otherwise unreliable. i understand that, and i see the need to solve that problem. but i do not see it as a character flaw, so how could i be judged based on that? i honestly strongly object to people being judged on the decisions they make, as many people make wrong choices for reasons beyond their control- lack of forsight- panic- fright, and the list goes on. im irrational and irresponsible, that i know better than most, and i make terrible decisions that i know i will one day come to regret. it is a difficult thing, to be judged by the decisions you make, but it is another i will have to overcome.

and i have to make the right decisions.

goodbye everyone, a hug and a kiss.

I wish you, sez I

2006-06-07T04:07:00.000-07:00

I had my first ART lesson in about, lets see, 6 months? and I must say i did not do too badly. it was pretty fruitful. i drew a GORGEOUS, GORGEOUS portrait of billie holiday, although to malisa's and many other people's opinion i made her look manly, EUGH! how hurtful. MIND YOU not many of my drawings are gorgeous, most are lopsided and look cross-eyed, so because i did a reasonably good job with thid one, i thought i'd share with those i love :D!

i've come to the conclusion that obese angmoh looking girls attract chee ko pehks.

why, you say?

HORROR NO.1

I get in a cab. taxi driver looks about late50s-ish, asks me where i want to go, i say forum. drives for abit, then says

Chee ko pehk: eh girl, wat is yaur name?

Me: uh, Gloria*

CKP: ahh. how ol ish you?

Me: hesitates- 21 ( i was afraid he got kicks from molesting fat minors)

CKP: orh. you got boyfriend

Me: horrified- yah. im getting married.

CKP: you gort phone?

Me: no.

CKP: You wan my mamber? den maybe i take you go out jalan- you wan?

Me: NO.

CKP: don worry lah- afternoon lah, den your boyfriend wun know.

Me: looking at the door making sure he doesnt lock me in- NO, I THINK I'LL PASS.

CKP: you swer you dowan my number?

Me: very. -slam door

i knw what many of you must be thinking- YOU STUPID GIRL, YOU SHULD HAVE TOTALLY SCOLDED HIM AND SCREAMED AT HIM, but the fact remains that i was completely vulnerable as i was in his cab, eh? could've taken me anywhere. had to be polite.

plus i was also shit scared of him, heh.

HORROR NO 2

lido macs, me n weifen

old man approaches and asks me," ESCUE ME, EH- DIS CHINATOWN?"

me. perplexed-"uh, no. this is orchard."

old man" WAAAAAAH, YOU SHOO BEAUTIFUL- TU TUTU- I LAF YOU- WAHH

i look at weifen, as i think, he cant be saying what i think he's saying. but she starts laughing.

me." EW. FUCK OFF!!!"

he runs away.

then he walked by again and started proclaiming his love, to my horror and to weifen's amusement.

HORROR 3

mrt (MOST DISGUSTING ATTEMPT)

man: harlo ahgirl. you wan to have lunch wif me??

licks his fingers, then puts his salivated fingers on the pole handle.

ME: NO, AND GET THE HELL AWAY FROM ME."

he edges away. i felt like hurling.

i sWEAR! old men have a sort of fetish for fat girls. THREE TIMES, AND IM NOT EXACTLY WHAT YOU'D CALL, ?

I should remove my lack of breasts and come off as a boy.

all in favour, comment!

good day, and i wish you never to get harrassed by cheeko pehks!

big O

2006-06-02T02:52:00.000-07:00

o level stress is getting to me.

and it's only bloody june.

my life is coming to a standstill- with a melange of sciences maths and literature. oh, woe be me! my mother wants me to take up ART again! what torture. anyway i shall put a halt to my ever-dwindling social life, which i am going to go all out to improve by december. im going to dye my hair pink and give my mother a nasty heart attack.

mischeivous snigger.

you know she wants me to join the LYRIC OPERA? like HELLL i would. im not being a right snob, i love classical music and that, but i hate SINGING it. it's RESTRICTIVE and INCOMPREHENSIBLE. i have not the discipline nor perserverance to stand still for hours on end singing a song in latin gibberish (it's a beautiful language, but it is nevertheless, dead) i will not, SHALL not, join the lyric opera. of course whether i'll get in is an entirely different issue, but i am not a classical singer to begin with! it's NOT ME.

it's like asking luciano pavorotti to sing "oops, i did it again". case bloody closed!

i shall be on my way, studying phy/chem today! wish me luck.

a love poem i wrote for no paticular reason with no intended recipient-

i find you quite charming
which is quite alarming
for this feeling you've brought,
has caused much distraught.
but now that you know
that I love you so
my very last wish
is for your tender kish!

goodbye everyone, and fall madly inlove!